It was interesting how this all came about in the first place. Fall 2009 I felt like God was calling me to go on a mission trip. To me, this was out of left field. But at the same time, I don't think I should say that, because if I look back on things and how I am as a person, it makes sense. Now, looking back on it, it was there all along... So, I felt this calling but had no idea where, or how or anything. Thanksgiving weekend I was at church, and was flipping through what all was going on in Hosanna!, and I saw they were having a meeting in January about going to Canada to teach Vacation Bible School. This was one of those "God things" that people always talk about. I thought to myself, Oh what's this? I'll check this out. Little did I know that this would be one of the biggest God-altering moves of my life.
I went to the meeting in January, and for whatever reason, decided to go. I literally had no idea why or what I was getting myself into. About a month after I decided to go, the spiritual warfare began big time. It was mostly physical stuff, just getting sick, not feeling well and then the icing on the cake was in May when I got this mysterious illness I had no idea what it was, and neither did my doctor. I kept getting headaches, and I NEVER get headaches. Ever. Eventually they determined what I had was the shingles. Yeah, no joke. On my head, no less! Diane Grobe (who went to Canada with us that year) said I had some major divine protection because having the shingles on your head can kill you...and especially with them not knowing for weeks what it was...
After that happened, and I was feeling overwhelmed with the amount of stress I was under, I said to my mom, "Maybe I shouldn't go..." She looked at me and said, "No. You HAVE to go. All those people are counting on you!!" I also had the feeling that this was somewhat a ploy from the enemy to get me to try to back out. So I decided that I needed to go.
I was nervous on the drive up, and was under some spiritual attacks, but I was with a group of such strong believers that there was lots of prayer and I could feel God beginning to change me already....especially the second night when we were in Flin Flon, staying at the Prospector Inn. The second night we are in Canada, we have team time where we worship and pray. We were having prayer time in one of the hotel rooms and I knew Randy was supposed to pray for me. So I went to him for prayer and the next thing I knew, I was waking up on the floor, covered by a blanket. The Holy Spirit had taken me down in a pretty powerful way, and that was the beginning of the change inside of me...the REAL, HUGE change.
Sunday we headed to Pelican Narrows for church before the Sandy Bay team split off to head to Sandy...(it's another hour from Pelican). On the car ride I was filled with nervous excitement and anticipation. I really wasn't sure what to expect...but I will never, ever forget what I felt when I got there...
I got out of the car, and my heart instantly melted and broke at the same time, and I fell in love with the beautiful people of God I saw before me. I also felt like I had come home.....to a place I had never been or heard of. Every time I go back I say to myself, "I'm home."
This summer in Sandy was the best summer I had ever had there. I think it was because I had stopped hiding and stopped worrying about how inadequate I am and all the things I lack and am unable to do and I just let Jesus work through me. I quit focusing on my insecurities and focused on Christ. I just showed up and let Him use me how He saw fit. And that's really what He wants from us. Not perfection, not having it all together...but just a willing heart. (The fact that I am writing this right now is giving me some revelation to other areas of my life...)
So essentially, what I am saying is that half the time my mind is up in Sandy Bay, and pretty sure my heart is there more than that. I wish there was a way for me to just get there quicker...actually I would move there if God told me to. The people there have become more than just people...they have become dear friends and family in Christ. Sometimes it's hard to be one place and wish you were in another.....
In Christ,
Meg
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